One of my former co-workers and now dear friend always used the expression, “Put on your Big Girl Panties”. She is such a positive person, it came off in a very loving way. I think it is her way of reminding others to be assertive and not passive. So one day I was struggling with approaching a potential client after she had rejected a proposal. I could hear my friend “You can do this, Tami. Just put on your big girl panties.” Okay. Sure. But how?
1. Figure out what's the Front what's the Back In which I mean look at the situation. Determine what the problem is.
2. Stand With the Panties Ready Make a plan for how you will take action to reach a resolution
3. Put on Your Panties One Leg at a time Execute your plan one step at a time. Otherwise you might lose your balance
4. Pull Your Panties Up Once you've gone through your steps, be sure you resolved your issue. Is everything in place and taken care of?
5. You're Wearing Big Girl Panties! Great job! By this point the problem is either resolved or you're standing with two legs in one hole (go back to step 3).
So these steps seem pretty simple. Just as simple as it was to put on your underwear this morning (Please don't tell me if you didn't put any on). But for some who are just encountering their first critical situations as the person accountable, it can be very difficult just figuring out what to do. If you've seen small children putting on their big girl panties and big boy briefs, you know it can be a challenge to maintain balance and get them pulled up just right with everything in place. Being new to a career, position, or any difficult situation is just as much of a challenge.
Let's go through an example. These steps apply inside and outside the work place, so here's a personal situation:
Kathy and Tanya have been friends for a few years now. Their “go to” plan is having supper at restaurant near their homes. Kathy notices Tanya is forgetting her wallet more frequently or asking Kathy to “get it this time” in return it would be Tanya's treat next time. But next time never seems to come. Kathy is noticing a strain on her checking account. It's time Kathy puts on her Big Girl Panties!
Step 1: The front from the back- Tanya isn't paying her way and depending on me for supper. Step 2: Panties ready- The next time she calls to go out to eat, I'll say “Sure. But I'm on a tight budget so you'll have to pay for your own” Step 3: One leg at a time- Tanya called and agreed to pay for her own. Step 4: Pull them up- Here comes the bill. "I'll wait for Tanya to put out her payment first then I'll put mine out there for the server." thinks Kathy Step 5: BGP- Yay! Kathy's wearing big girl panties!
I hope putting on your big girl panties reminds you to be assertive. Sometimes it seems easier to just be a Passive Patty but in the long run it's not. You can put on your Big Girl Panties!
