Before we get into having a mentor and being a mentor, we need to clarify what kind of mentoring. There’s youth mentoring and professional mentoring. For the purpose of this post, we’re going to focus on professional, workplace mentor relationships. Let’s begin with what it means to have a mentor and what it means to be a mentor and which should you do. The tl;dr version of it is… do both! At various points in your career you should have a mentor and be a mentor.
Having a Mentor
If you have a mentor this means you are a mentee. Someone has taken you under their wing to help you develop a set of skills or grow your knowledge in a specific area. Sometimes you choose your mentor and other times the mentor chooses you. The most important thing to say about getting a mentor is that it might happen naturally but there will be times when you have to ask to be mentored. Be Brave! Choose someone who does what you want to do and ask him or her to be your mentor! And then be a good mentee by following these three steps:
Be prepared
Follow through
Show appreciation
How do you do that? Come with questions to ask, a topic to discuss, or a situation where you need advice. If they give you a task to complete before you meet next, complete the task before you meet. It will show your commitment to the relationship. And always, always show appropriate appreciation. Mentors usually do not get paid for the time they spend with you. The only reward for a mentor is your resulting success and your gratitude. A handwritten thank you with a small gift at the conclusion of your mentoring is a nice way to say “thanks”.
Being a Mentor
There will always be someone younger and less experienced. You have experiences from which others can benefit. Whether you feel worthy of being a mentor or not, the opportunities to mentor someone happen the same way as you probably got your first mentor-- either organically or by asking. If you are just itching to become a mentor then head to your learning and development folks in the company you work for or even your boss. Let them know you would like to become a mentor to help the company. Giving specific examples of your strengths can help them identify someone who may need your help. How do you ensure you are being a good mentor?
Set clear expectations
Maintain professionalism
Be truly helpful
What does it take to be a good mentor? Dedicate a time to your mentee. Whether it is a one-off or recurring meeting, put it on your calendar and respect that meeting time. The same goes for your mentee. Setting clear expectations begins with an understanding of the expected relationship. Each mentee will be different so you may have to be more specific with some than others. Some mentees you may not have to do more than just show up on time to the meeting and be ready for some great conversation. Other mentees will need you to spell out that you are meeting to focus on their professional development and assign them tasks to complete before you meet. Always remember it is a professional relationship. The mentees are looking to you for an example of how to conduct themselves in the professional world. They will do as you do and not always as you say. And be truly helpful. Just as important as maintaining professionalism is, so is providing value and a benefit to the time you spend with your mentee. Your reputation is what others say about you. The goal is to have mentees who share positive feedback about their time with you. When these mentees look back on their lives, they will remember who helped them get where they are in their professional careers.
One last piece of advice: Be On Time! Both of you! Being on time says to the other person that you respect their time. When you are late or constantly rescheduling it says to the other person, “My time is more important than your time.” Mentors and mentees can benefit from being punctual. But life happens and meetings run over. Mentors and mentees do not need to be perfect, the just need each other.
Resources:
How to become a mentor by Monster.ca covers the basics of what to do once you become a mentor. https://www.monster.ca/career-advice/article/tips-on-how-to-become-a-mentor
What kind of mentoring should you do? University of Melbourne gives several examples of mentoring from Informal to Formal and from Peer Mentoring to Reverse Mentoring.
Do you have advice for a first time Mentor or Mentee? Comment below!
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